The Great Bathing Suit Search

Every year, women put themselves through the dreaded process of trying to find a cute bathing suit that minimizes their flaws (yes, we do actually have some) and emphasizes their attributes (showin' what ya momma gave ya). Because it's highly unlikely that the perfect swim suit actually exists, we ladies have to try on every suit ever created to find something remotely close. After many turns in front of the three-way mirror and requests for friends and significant others to swear they'll admit if our butts look big, we finally select one and hope that we don't gain weight over the several months between swim suit selection season (spring) and swim suit wearing season (summer).

Now, imagine that going through that process with a basketball in your belly. That is the experience I had tonight.

You see, my mom, Lynn, is flying into town tomorrow and will stay until Sunday evening. Geof and I thought her visit would be the perfect opportunity for a day trip to Wrightsville Beach, so we're going on Friday. I was totally excited, because my pasty white skin has barely seen the sun all season, and I don't want to scare the Wonder Twins when they come into the world with my white glow.

Then, I remembered the bathing suit issue. Hmmm. I hadn't planned on buying a maternity suit, because I figured it wouldn't be worth the expense. I had planned on just wearing a little terry cloth A-line skirt and a bikini top and calling it a day at the beach. Um, yeah. That plan went out the window, when the thermometer hit 95 degrees today. I knew there was no way I could sit at the beach in the heat and not go for a refreshing dip in the ocean. Terry cloth and water? Not so much.

So, before Geof's kickball game tonight, I went to Target. I knew the discount chain carried some some suits for the mommy-to-be set and was estatic when I saw the tops and bottoms were on sale for $14 each! Score! The problem was there were only about nine pieces left and of course, they were not in my size. "XS" and "XXL" were not exactly going to get the job done.

I did not dismay, though, because I knew there was another Target closer to the fields where Geof's team, Guaranteed Third Base, was playing. I stopped in and miraculously found more options than at the last store. While trying on a few tops, I asked the lady working in the fitting room if she could find the bottoms I liked in my size. She checked in the computer and discovered one at the Target store in Cary. I immediately asked her to put them on hold for me. I left with a black and white zig-zag halter swim suit top and grand visions of picking up the matching bottoms after Geof's game.

I skipped the post-victory party at Buffalo Wild Wings in Brier Creek and headed for Target in Cary. I went straight to the Guest Services area and asked for my item. My anxious excitement fizzled, when I discovered it was not the adorable skirt I thought I was getting, but instead a pair of boy shorts made of swim suit material. Not cute.

I trudged back to the maternity section for the third time in one night, praying there would be something decent in my size that would not make me look like a sea monster. I prefer not to scare small children, if possible, with my ever-enlarging belly.

I dragged a few options back to the dressing room and starting trying on suits. Again. The first one was a big, fat "no." It was comfortable, but the colors left quite a bit to be desired. The second one I liked, so I ventured out of the dressing room, daring to sneak a peek in the three-way mirror. With no one available to tell me if my butt looked as big as my belly, I needed the additional mirrors for feedback. The verdict? Good!

I returned the 1970s-inspired zig-zag top and purchased the suit that passed the mirror test. The top is purple, navy and white with flowers on it and a little ruffle across the top. It makes my baby bump look kinda cute, rather than like a just swallowed a watermelon. The bottoms are navy and have a mini skirt over the briefs to shield my upper thighs from view. (Absolutely necessary) It was a nice purchase for $28! Oh, and the Wonder Twins approve. I'd hate to start embarrassing them before they're out of the womb!

I'll be sure to post pics of me wearing it at the beach Friday. Can't wait for the babies' first swim in the ocean. Thank goodness, we can leave the terry cloth skirt at home.