Thursday, August 20, 2009

Open Up and Say "Floss!"

No one can put a guilt trip on a pregnant lady like a dental hygienist.

I never thought I would say that, but it's true. I swear.

I had my six-month check up back in May. Obviously, I knew I was having the Wonder Twins at that point, so I made sure to tell the dentist about my baby bump before any cleaning (or gnashing) of teeth began.

He went about the regular routine of using that "whurrrring" device to clean my teeth and then hosed them off with the professional grade squirt gun. After he was done, he proclaimed my teeth and gums healthy, and left to take care his next patient.

That's when I got the lecture from dentist's helper, the hygienist.

Instead of just handing off the complimentary tooth bruth and tooth paste and sending me on to the receptionist to schedule my next appointment, she sat down and starting talking about the importance of flossing.

OK, I know flossing is important. I just didn't do it as often as I should. Admit it. You don't, either.

With no solid reasons to back up my infrequent flossing, I was forced to endure the lecture, defenseless.

The hygienist went on to tell me that UNC-CH had done lots of studies about pregnant women and flossing. Apparently, all those strands of string led the Tarheels to a single conclusion - that mommies-to-be who don't floss are more likely to have low birth-weight babies.

Great. How could I not floss after hearing a story like that? I half thought she was lying, because she knew I would be forced to transform into a neurotic flosser, but I didn't feel like investing the time to attempt to disclose her false pretenses.

So, now I floss. Every night. With perfect accuracy.

If I forget, I stumble out of bed and do it in the dark.

By golly, if the twins are tiny, it will NOT be because I didn't floss.

My next check up is scheduled for Nov. 2. Theoretically, the girls should still be in my belly at that time.

When I open up for the hygienist, I will be expecting some "atta girls" for my new found, guilt-influenced dental dedication.

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